Hernia surgery

I am a victim of a cruel disease on the face of humanity. I am speaking of the terrible thing called a "hernia". I found out I was with Hernia at age 31. It was a scary thing, because I noticed a lump in my groin. I went to the doctor and he confirmed what I thought. Well, not so much, I thought the lump might be something worse. Like some kind of lymphoid thing, forgive me but I am not a person who tries to learn alot of terminology, It was a lump in my groin!! I was told it was an inguinal hernia. That put my mind at ease because I was thinking cancer.I followed up with a surgical consult about two weeks after that. Upon meeting with the surgeon, I dropped my pants and let him grope me. At my dismay, he told me that the lump was a lymphoid. But he did feel that there was a hernia in my groin. He told me that he could do a biopsy of the lymphoid, but felt it was not cancerous because it has shrank in size since I first noticed it. I told him no because I am prone to lumps, growths, and swollen glands. Heine site, I should of had the biopsy done, but Heine site is 20/20. The surgeon schedules me for surgery a week later.Fast forward to the surgery, I am pretty cool knowing I am going to get surgery. I had my wisdom teeth pulled, so I know what it is like to be put under, so I thought. I get prep for surgery and speak with the nurse, so far so good, then the anesthesiologist comes in. He asks me to stick my tongue out, open my mouth, and bite my upper lip. Then he lets me know that there may be some damage to my teeth from the breathing tube. It took a few seconds to sink in, but I was being told I was going to get that breathing tube, that you see on TV hospital sitcoms, placed in my mouth and then continued down my throat until it was in a good place to make sure I can breath if I was no longer able to breath on my own. Its all good because the anesthesiologist told me that I would be asleep when they placed it in my throat. I felt compelled to tell him I have a sensitive gag reflex and that I have yawned two times and had my jaw lock open, and I immediately freaked out and punched my face/jaw until it was no longer locked in the open position. He put me at ease by saying "that is fine" and I replied "Hurry up so I can be home!"So I proceed to the pre op room where I get a visit from my surgeon. He goes through the the basics with me and places an X on my left side with a marker. So they do the procedure on the correct side. Great news, crayola markers are the final check mark off of the pre surgery checklists. So I have my crayola X and I am being placed under anesthesia. All I remember is feeling like a drunk monkey talking stupid to the people in the surgery room. I couldn't tell you how I got in the surgery room, except I remember people all around me. I think I heard someone say "He has a big one, and a hairy one at that! We need more razors!" It might of been the drugs, I don't know.Nevertheless, the surgery was complete before I knew I was awake. I was in recovery feeling the worse hang over I have EVER felt! I couldn't focus my vision on anything. I kept asking the nurses for water, but all I got was ice chips. My head was mush and my throat was raw. The nurse in the recovery asked me how I was doing, and all I remember telling her was "I want to go home" Fast forward through all the grogginess and leaving the hospital, I was home at last.The recovery wasn't bad at all. I spent the day after the surgery in bed watching TV. That sucky part was there wasn't anything good on TV, and when I had to go to the bathroom. You would be surprised how important your stomach is for almost EVERYTHING you do to move around. Getting out of bed was hard. But healing is a process and it has gotten easier these last 4 days. I wont go over what I had to do the day after surgery to get convalescence leave. SOB's made me travel 45 mins to get paper work filled out, that I could have gotten filled out a week before the surgery. But that is what they call health care.So now I have a little over two weeks off from work to heal. The healing is doing OK and I feel pretty good. The only thing is my left nut, or the stuff in the left sack, is swelling up. I will need to let the surgeon know about that this week when I get my stitches out.So all in all, not a bad experience. I haven't taken any pain pills for the pain. Except for the vicadon I got at the hospital after the surgery. It has been uncomfortable, but I am not a big fan of pain pills. The worst part of the recovery has been the pain from the gas that they put in my stomach to inflate and separate to do the surgery. It has felt like the worst case of gas and having to take a shit pains I have felt in a long time. I am a fighter and a lover of time off from work!!!Peace and all that other shit!IamTheDumbOne